Puerto Rico’s citizens want their status to be one of three things - independent of the U.S.A., the 51st state, or for it to remain as it is - a free associated state, and/or commonwealth of the U.S.A.
In eight days, Scotland will vote for its independence from England. This is a big deal and the world is watching. I’m watching and waiting to see what will happen to the impressive country that spawns a wonderful alcoholic beverage, great minds, beautiful scenery, and awesome (different word than awesome, can be more elegant) accents. But I have an ulterior motive. I’m taking notes while thinking of what will happen to the American colony that my parents hail from - Puerto Rico.
Puerto Rico’s citizens want their status to be one of three things - independent of the U.S.A., the 51st state, or for it to remain as it is - a free associated state, and/or commonwealth of the U.S.A.
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Depending on where you are from, the word “Lady” has a certain connotation. I grew up in the late seventies/early eighties in a family that moved a lot. To me, “Lady” was a Kenny Rogers song, a room where women went to use the facilities, and the name my aunt had given to her dog. In some parts of the American South (and the North, too) being a Lady means that a woman carries herself in a way that does not bring shame to herself or others. In the United Kingdom, a Lady could actually be the female equivalent to a titled gentleman, or a Lord. However, I think that it is widely accepted that Lady is a term of respect for a woman. Usually. But something’s happened over the past 50 or so years; somewhere along the way, it became uncool to be ladylike. Maybe it was sometime during the opening of warships and other combat roles for women in the 1990s, the Title IX passage in the 1970s, or even the womens’ rights movement that commenced during the late 19th century. Don’t get me wrong; I don’t bemoan those wonderful movements, as I have benefited from them directly. As a single, divorced mother, my mom was able to buy a house under her name (thank you, Homestead Act of 1862 and Equal Credit Opportunity Act of 1974). In the mid-1990s, I was allowed the privilege to join the U.S. Navy; during that time, I was able to be part of the first generation of women who were allowed to serve on warships (in 1997 I had the privilege to meet the first enlisted woman who had served on an actual warship - I wish I remembered her name!) My ancestry has always interested me. I grew up speaking Spanish and English at home; in the states, I thought of my Puerto Rican heritage. While living in P.R., I frequently thought about the country of my birth.
In Hispanic countries, women do not change their surnames. Throughout their lives, they carry their father’s name first, and their mother’s last name second. I loved hearing the surnames attached to my family members….Rios, Santiago, Del Rio, Ramos, Cardona, Viruet, Robles, Morales…and so on. I smiled as I listened to my seven year old sing. Pride burst in me, and I was glad that he wouldn’t be afraid to express himself in an artistic manner (which he’d inherited from me, as his father is a bit more reserved).
“Is it easy to sleep in the bed that we made? When you don’t look back I guess the feelings start to fade away,” he crooned. I cringed as I heard Steven Tyler’s lyrics coming out of my son’s young mouth. What was I teaching my son? Did he understand what kind of bed Tyler was alluding to? Maybe not. Making a bed is a concept he is familiar with, but, unfortunately, is not a practice he’s yet adopted. I decided to play stupid. Maybe he didn’t get it. Fortunately, he changed his tune a couple of minutes later. “What becomes of the brokenhearted? Who had love that’s now departed?” How do women find and define success while affiliated with the military? Can a military spouse be successful in a career while frequently transferring from duty station to duty station?
How about female active duty service members? How can they balance successful military careers while keeping a happy home life? I found two great, successful military women to pose those questions to - a military spouse and nurse, and a Master Chief with the U.S. Navy with a family of her own. To make things interesting and to keep the ladies on topic, I asked them the same exact questions. I don’t know when it started getting away from me, but I knew the precise moment when I noticed its absence. It was late at night and I was in bed with my cell phone and my laptop to keep me company. I’d just gotten off the phone with my husband and had told him that it was okay for him to use the last $20 in our account to go and watch a movie with his friends. (Disclaimer: it was the last $20 in our “slush” fund, not our real savings account. Also, he was overseas for work and bored). But it really wasn’t okay. But if it wasn’t okay, why did I say yes?
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AuthorCyndia is a writer based out of San Diego, whose past experiences include six years in the Navy (full of lovely sea-sickness), many adventures working in customer service, and being happily dragged across the country while her husband finishes his own career in the military. When not writing essays, articles, women's fiction/suspense novels, or paranormal novellas, Cyndia can be found reading, cooking, hiking, homeschooling her son, watching HGTV, or unapologetically wasting time on Pinterest and other social media outlets. You can keep up with her musings here or on Facebook. Archives
September 2015
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